Why Do We Call It 'Monday'?

It's easy to be a bit saddened about Monday rolling around. We can't believe the weekend is already over!
And yet, just thinking about the word "Monday" raises some questions. Why is it called that? Who came up with the name? And why do the other days of the week have their own similarly peculiar names?
Actually, there's some fascinating mythology behind most of the names of the days of the week. Time to take a trip to Asgard!
The Gods of Your Schedule
You may or may not know it, but old pagan gods are hiding in your weekly planner.
Most days of the week are named after figures from Norse mythology. They stem from the English language's roots in the old Anglo-Saxon, Germanic, and Norse languages; if you look at the German days of the week, you'll find a lot of mythic overlap (even if the names are a bit different).
Let's give each of them a moment in the spotlight!
Tuesday
Tuesday is "Tyr's Day." Tyr, also called Tiw in Old English, was a war god like his father Odin. He also presided over matters of law and justice, best exemplified in the story he's best known for: The Binding of Fenrir.
Fenrir, one of the monstrous children of the trickster Loki, was a giant wolf destined to eat the sun and the moon during Ragnarok, the Norse apocalypse. To prevent – or at least delay – this, the gods tricked Fenrir into letting them bind him in a magical fetter. However, Fenrir would only trust the gods if one of them stuck their hand in his mouth as a sign of goodwill.
Tyr volunteered, despite knowing what would happen. Indeed, when Fenrir couldn't break out of the constraint and the gods refused to release him, he bit off Tyr's hand. Henceforth, Tyr was depicted as one-handed.
Wednesday
Wednesday is "Odin's Day." In Old English his name was Woden, hence the W in the weekday's name. Odin was the chief of the Aesir, the primary family of Norse gods who lived in Asgard. In most stories, he's at least partly responsible for the world's creation with his brothers and earned the title "All-Father."
Odin's domain was over war, poetry, rulership, and wisdom. Additionally, he presided over magic, often making him seem mysterious and distant. His driving focus was to prevent or delay Ragnarok as much as possible. Famously, he had his Valkyries bring the souls of fallen warriors to his hall, Valhalla, to feast and prepare for that final battle.
Thursday
Thursday is "Thor's Day." The most famous of all the Norse gods, thanks in part to his depiction in Marvel® Comics (although the Thor of mythology was a redhead, not blonde), Thor is mainly remembered as the god of thunder. Even his iconic weapon, the one-handed hammer Mjollnir (meaning "lightning" in old Norse), plays into this role. However, Thor also presided over agriculture and fertility and was beloved by both warriors and farmers.
Thor plays a significant role in the surviving stories of Norse mythology, usually defending Asgard from the giants. There's a reason he got transformed into a superhero in the modern day!
Friday
Friday is "Frigg's Day." Also known as Frigga or Fricka, Frigg is the highest goddess among the Aesir family of Gods and wife of Odin. Her domain focused on fertility, much like her stepson Thor, and marriage. Moreover, Norse worshippers considered her very connected to magic and divination.
Frigga was the mother of Baldur, a beautiful and beloved god among the Aesir. In one of her few direct appearances in the Norse myths, Frigg dreamed of Baldur's death and so went around the world to make everything promise never to harm her son. However, she did not extract such a promise from the humble mistletoe plant. The trickster god Loki used this oversight to cause Baldur's death... an event which heralded the coming of Ragnarok.
Interestingly, Frigg and the love goddess Freyja are often conflated with one another, and they may have even been the same deity at one time. Freyja was also highly connected to magic and divination but has a far more involved role in mythology. If they were the same goddess, their splitting in various retellings might explain why Frigg appears so rarely.
What About the Other Days?
English draws from both Germanic languages and Latin, explaining the more than occasional linguistic overlap with Romance languages like Spanish, Italian, and French. This is evident in some of the thematic similarities surrounding our remaining weekday names:
Monday
Monday is the Moon's Day, which is also true of the Romance languages (although "Luna" is the root for the days' names in the other languages).
Sunday
Sunday is the Sun's Day, which is also true for Latin while the younger Romance languages generally call the day a variation on "Lord's Day," due to its Christian connotations.
That just leaves one.
Saturday
Saturday is "Saturn's Day." Saturn is the only explicitly Greco-Roman god on the English calendar, the name evoked for the first day of the weekend across dozens of languages. Saturn is often equated with the Greek titan Cronus, the monstrous being that ate his children to prevent them from challenging his rule (spoiler: that didn't work). However, the Saturn of Roman mythology was far more relaxed and benevolent. He was a grain and agriculture deity who, before the ascent of the gods, ruled over a Golden Age. His December festival, Saturnalia, was a time of joy and goodwill that Romans looked forward to celebrating.
All this random mythical trivia may seem frivolous, but now you'll never think of Tuesday the same way, knowing its namesake got his hand bitten off to save all of existence!
References: "Tyr." Norse Mythology for Smart People | "Odin." Norse Mythology for Smart People. | "Thor." Norse Mythology for Smart People. | "Frigg." Norse Mythology for Smart People. | "Saturn: Roman God." Britannica. | "Frigg: Norse Mythology." Brittannica. | Gaiman, Neil. Norse Mythology. New York, W.W. Norton & Company, 2017.